Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Decisions, Sigh of Relief, Court Date

In life we want guarantees. We want to know for sure that something will happen in a predictable order on an assigned date. When you are involved in an adoption in a foreign country this is never more true, we want a predictable timeline to outline events that happen exactly on certain dates. We, the adoptive parents, want some semblance of control. Well, this is real life, and real life is perfect or to a timetable. I've been struggling with my plan for returning home. I have tickets booked, which you all know about, and I wanted to know when I'd go to court to ensure I could use those tickets. But a death in the family (translator), hospitalization (judge), cancelled flights due to weather (friends) and lack of alternate flights (everyone travelling for the holidays) is the reality of real life. I've been trying to fit my life into this pattern, but I couldn't get a guarantee and that was stressing me out. So last night I decided to extend the time I'm here until mid-January. Whew, what a relief.

As my new friend Kendra would say, I've abandoned plan A and I'm focusing on plan B. Here's the new plan. I'll stay here until the end of the 15 day appeal period. Then I will go and get MLM's birth certificate, which here must be picked up in person. Then I will give it to my coordinator to take care of the passport and visa situation. Passport and visa should take roughly 3 weeks, and during those weeks I'll be at home working. After the 3 weeks are over I'll return here to pick up MLM, a short 7 to 10 day trip. There you have it plan B.

What finally tipped the scale for me was watching the difficulty my friends have had with their trip home and back recently. Both journeys took an additional 2 days. Keep in mind that the usual trip here is a 3 day journey. Bad weather lead to the cancellation or rerouting of their flights. That, for me at this time is just unnecessary stress.

Now that the decision is made, I feel so much better. Then this morning in the car on the way to the baby house I learned that my court date is the 28th of December. Just what I was hoping for LOL.

Of course in the end, this is my plan with the appeal period, the judge could decide to wave the appeal period and I'd have to come up with a totally new plan, but then that would be totally normal in the world of international adoption.

On the MLM front, we had a lovely 30 minute visit today. He was very congested and very thirsty. I'll have to buy a small bottle of water so I can give him water after his drink of juice. We looked at the baby word book and the picture album. He points to pictures in album for me to tell him who the people are, this is new. Of course he equally points to the cartoon animals that are printed on the plastic photo album as well as the pictures of my brother, sister and friends. At the end of our time he walked with me to the playroom and waved, I think he trusts that I will return to play with him again.

This morning my friends arrived, finally after a 2 day delay, they are exhausted. This afternoon they picked up their son from the baby house. I will miss seeing him everyday, it will be strange not to see him on Saturday (the next time I'm to go to the baby house).

I learned this morning that my coordinator, who wasn't feeling well yesterday, is in the hospital. I hope it isn't something serious. She told my translator that she doesn't have time to be sick as she has so much paperwork to do.

Okay, it is nearly 9 am back home, I have a few phone calls to make to let people know I'll be returning in mid-January.
Paka paka.

1 comment:

Stacey and Dave said...

You're right - always have a plan B, C, and D ready!
I can't say whether it's changed since I was there in 2008, but at that time, it was normal (and expected) that the judge waived the 15 day appeal period. We thought we would pick up our son from the babyhouse the day after court - but we got him out the day of court!
(And I know that was a Uralsk thing - not typical in any other city).

So keep up with the positive thoughts - you'll be home with your son soon!