I'm in the half-way point of my wait to go back to Kazakhstan, in fact I will be back in Uralsk in 2 weeks today. I am so excited with the idea of being back with Denis. On the weekend I bought and set up his toddler bed. Everytime I look at it I just can't help smiling. My little boy is going to sleep there very soon.
It is very strange to be home. Everything is exactly the same, but at the same time nothing is the same. I arrived home on a Sunday afternoon and actually returned to work on the Monday morning. I was jet lagged and stunned but boy was it ever so nice to be earning money again.
It has also been wonderful to have my sister home again. I so missed her while I was away. I have never been away from my sister for such a long period of time. It was really hard. Kathryn is the only one that I couldn't speak to while I was away. And I wasn't able to get much information on how she was doing as I seemed to only get agency/relief staff at the house when I called. I don't know if she understands that her nephew will be here in 3 weeks. I show her pictures of Denis and tell her all about him. She can say something that sounds like Denis, it is really similiar of 'dance' what she calls Lawrence Welk. My brother really hopes that Denis doesn't come to love Lawrence Welk like his aunt.
Now back to more child proofing the house. Where did all that stuff come from?
Monday, January 31, 2011
Saturday, January 15, 2011
Started Home
I've begun my journey home.
I would have said that I'm part way home, but in fact I'm further away from home today then I was yesterday. I'm in Almaty. I flew here last night, and very early tomorrow I will fly home. I was very sad to say goodbye to Denis, Yulia, Nastya and Andre. I know I will be back in one month to be reunited with my little man, and we will never have to say paka again. I'll teach him to say goodbye instead :-)
Almaty is so much bigger than Uralsk. I'm in the big city now. I've been on highways and been in a grocery store 4 times the size of any of the grocery stores that I shopped at in Uralsk.
I'm staying with Louisa and her family in an apartment in Almaty. It is wonderful to be with her again. We've chatted on-line most days since she came back, but it is so much easier when you don't have to type.
In 13 hours we will be packing up and moving off to the airport to fly home. I know I'll have to pay for a second bag. What a shock! I was allowed to bring 2 free bags here, but I only get one free bag going home. I'll know better next journey. Frankly my bags are packed with a ton less than I brought, and I know I won't be bring anywhere near as much next time, I barely used the stuff I did bring.
Paka paka and see you from the other side of the world.
I would have said that I'm part way home, but in fact I'm further away from home today then I was yesterday. I'm in Almaty. I flew here last night, and very early tomorrow I will fly home. I was very sad to say goodbye to Denis, Yulia, Nastya and Andre. I know I will be back in one month to be reunited with my little man, and we will never have to say paka again. I'll teach him to say goodbye instead :-)
Almaty is so much bigger than Uralsk. I'm in the big city now. I've been on highways and been in a grocery store 4 times the size of any of the grocery stores that I shopped at in Uralsk.
I'm staying with Louisa and her family in an apartment in Almaty. It is wonderful to be with her again. We've chatted on-line most days since she came back, but it is so much easier when you don't have to type.
In 13 hours we will be packing up and moving off to the airport to fly home. I know I'll have to pay for a second bag. What a shock! I was allowed to bring 2 free bags here, but I only get one free bag going home. I'll know better next journey. Frankly my bags are packed with a ton less than I brought, and I know I won't be bring anywhere near as much next time, I barely used the stuff I did bring.
Paka paka and see you from the other side of the world.
Thursday, January 13, 2011
Denis is Officially My Son
Well, it is official. I have seen the final adoption decree, Denis is 100 % my son.
I am absolutely delighted and absolutely desolate at the same time. He is my son, but tomorrow I leave. I think he sort of understands that something is changing as he cried so hard today when I had to leave. We actually arrived in time to join his group going outside. As we walked around the Baby House building we saw my driver pull into the grounds of the Baby House, poor Denis began to cry, he must have thought that II would be leaving right away. Instead, Andre offered to give the children in Denis' group a ride around the baby house in the car. What a treat! The children and Andre had a great time. But all to soon I had to leave. I had to bring Denis inside and he cried the whole way. I quickly got him out of his clothes, gave him to the caregiver inside, and ran away, I was afraid I too would start to cry as hard as Denis. I was bad and just stuffed his clothes into his cubby, I wasn't neat at all.
After the baby house, Nastya and Yulia came to my apartment to help me fill in the last of the documents I need to do for Denis. Tomorrow I go and sign at the Register's office for his birth certificate and then back to the notary to sign some very final papers. I have one final visit with Denis and I head to Almaty. I will be leaving Denis with the photo album and a stuffed teddy bear, so I'm hoping the leave taking will not be so hard. It will also be hard saying goodbye to the team that has supported me here, Yulia, Nastya and Andre. I hope I can make it on to the plane without tears.
I'm very lucky tonight, my apartment has heat and hot water. I shall enjoy both.
Paka paka
I am absolutely delighted and absolutely desolate at the same time. He is my son, but tomorrow I leave. I think he sort of understands that something is changing as he cried so hard today when I had to leave. We actually arrived in time to join his group going outside. As we walked around the Baby House building we saw my driver pull into the grounds of the Baby House, poor Denis began to cry, he must have thought that II would be leaving right away. Instead, Andre offered to give the children in Denis' group a ride around the baby house in the car. What a treat! The children and Andre had a great time. But all to soon I had to leave. I had to bring Denis inside and he cried the whole way. I quickly got him out of his clothes, gave him to the caregiver inside, and ran away, I was afraid I too would start to cry as hard as Denis. I was bad and just stuffed his clothes into his cubby, I wasn't neat at all.
After the baby house, Nastya and Yulia came to my apartment to help me fill in the last of the documents I need to do for Denis. Tomorrow I go and sign at the Register's office for his birth certificate and then back to the notary to sign some very final papers. I have one final visit with Denis and I head to Almaty. I will be leaving Denis with the photo album and a stuffed teddy bear, so I'm hoping the leave taking will not be so hard. It will also be hard saying goodbye to the team that has supported me here, Yulia, Nastya and Andre. I hope I can make it on to the plane without tears.
I'm very lucky tonight, my apartment has heat and hot water. I shall enjoy both.
Paka paka
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Goodbye to the Fir Tree
Yesterday when we arrived at the baby house, it was to meet Denis' favourite caregiver rushing around as the children were going to see a special fairy tale. The children were all dressed in their finest clothes and were all beautifully groomed. We went into the music room and I was given permission to stay and watch. The children sat on benches and the nurses did the fairy tale.
First they told the story in Kazakh, then they repeated the story in Russian. It is the story of a little girl who goes into the woods to get a fir tree to decorate for the New Year. At the first tree she finds and decides to cut down she is stopped by the squirrel/chipmunk (or maybe a bird I couldn't quite see) that lives in the tree. At the second tree she is stopped by the fox who lives by the tree and at the third tree she is scared away by a bear. Upset that she can't find a tree she meets up with Father Frost who rewards her with a tree because she was kind and thoughtful to the animals of the woods when they asked her not to take their trees. Or I should say this is my understanding of the play without being given a translation.
After the 2 versions of the story, the caregivers gave each of the children an ornament to put on the little tree that they had used in the play. Then they all recited a poem and the lights on the tree came on. The children who had learned a poem or song during the Christmas/ New Year season were invited to stand up and recite the poem or sing the song, about 5 children spoke or sang. And finally all the children were given some treats to eat.
Before they left the music room, all the children recited a poem about the fir tree going away for another year and that it will return next year. There is a big decorated fir tree in the music room, on Friday the staff will be taking it down. They caregivers wanted to have a special ceremony to help the children understand. It was delightful.
The children, about 20 or so, probably 3 groups, were very well behaved. The oldest were under 4 and the youngest around a year and a half. I realize how far behind Denis is in his speech as 2 of his group mates were able to say a poem of 4 to 6 lines on their own, Denis uses a rare word spontaneously. Then again, many of the children were silent for the entire time, not even mouthing the poems recited as a group, I think many have speech delays. I can also see the problem in that the two groups 7 and 8 were together for the past 9 months or so and they would have had both Kazakh and Russian spoken to them all the time, it must have been confusing. Now I've added English to the mix. It is evident that Denis understands what is said to him as he does exactly as he is told.
After the play the children returned to their group area for afternoon meal. Today it was a roll filled with a cabbage, onion and carrot mixture and some biscuits and warm milk. As he was eating Yulia and I told Denis that I would be coming for 2 more visits and then I would be away for a many days. I used your phrases Amy about getting his bed ready and buying toys (his eyes lit up with that one). He also closed his eyes and pretended to sleep as Yulia was speaking to him, I know closing his eyes is one of Denis' coping mechanisms, I saw that a lot in the very early days of my visits. Then it was time to say goodbye for the day. I brought him back to his friends where they were eating in their little dinning room. His caregiver told him to blow kisses to his mama, which he very happily did.
So I have 2 more visits before I leave. Today I will go and buy a stuff toy for him for when I am gone. Thanks Diane for the encouragement.
I've pretty much packed everything and made the apartment as clean as I can. I did my final load of my laundry yesterday only to think I'd be returning home without all those clothes. The washing machines are front loaders here, but unlike at home, once you start them going they lock and cannot be opened until the wash finishes. I started the wash about and hour and 45 minutes before I needed to leave to go for lunch yesterday, the wash was suppose to take one hour and 20 minutes. At 11 (I needed to be out of the apartment at 11:25) the wash had 2minutes to go, great I thought, it will finish and I can hang the wash up to dry before I go. At 11:25 the wash was still going and still had 2 minutes to go, I was afraid if I left it, the machine would still be going when I came back from lunch, so I unplugged the machine. After lunch I plugged the machine back in and it said it had 3 minutes to go, 45 minutes later it was finally done. Whew, I was so happy to get my clothes back. I will be doing some more laundry before I go, but only with towels and linen from the apartment.
Oh and there is no heat, or barely any heat and no hot water in my apartment today. They are replacing the chimney for the boiler, so of course the work is being done now in January when the night time low goes to -26 or so. The apartment isn't actually cold, more in line with the temperature we'd have our home, but after the heat of the past 9 weeks it feels chilly.
And my other complaint is I think I've lost my satellite tv again. I don't know if it is time for the monthly payment, which wouldn't make sense to pay as I'm leaving tomorrow. Can you see me, no heat, no tv and the internet wouldn't stay connected, I was not a happy camper. I ended up going to bed at 9, I was so tired I think I went out like a light. But as the saying goes, early to bed early to rise, I was up just before 6 am our time.
I have to go the notary today to do something and I need to do paperwork for Denis' entry visa to Canada and today the judge is suppose to sign the adoption into reality as the 15 day appeal period ended yesterday. Tomorrow I go sign for his birth certificate, which here in Uralsk has to be done by the parents in person. And then I will have done everything I need to do.
I will have a visit today and a visit tomorrow and then I will be going home for the month.
Paka paka
First they told the story in Kazakh, then they repeated the story in Russian. It is the story of a little girl who goes into the woods to get a fir tree to decorate for the New Year. At the first tree she finds and decides to cut down she is stopped by the squirrel/chipmunk (or maybe a bird I couldn't quite see) that lives in the tree. At the second tree she is stopped by the fox who lives by the tree and at the third tree she is scared away by a bear. Upset that she can't find a tree she meets up with Father Frost who rewards her with a tree because she was kind and thoughtful to the animals of the woods when they asked her not to take their trees. Or I should say this is my understanding of the play without being given a translation.
After the 2 versions of the story, the caregivers gave each of the children an ornament to put on the little tree that they had used in the play. Then they all recited a poem and the lights on the tree came on. The children who had learned a poem or song during the Christmas/ New Year season were invited to stand up and recite the poem or sing the song, about 5 children spoke or sang. And finally all the children were given some treats to eat.
Before they left the music room, all the children recited a poem about the fir tree going away for another year and that it will return next year. There is a big decorated fir tree in the music room, on Friday the staff will be taking it down. They caregivers wanted to have a special ceremony to help the children understand. It was delightful.
The children, about 20 or so, probably 3 groups, were very well behaved. The oldest were under 4 and the youngest around a year and a half. I realize how far behind Denis is in his speech as 2 of his group mates were able to say a poem of 4 to 6 lines on their own, Denis uses a rare word spontaneously. Then again, many of the children were silent for the entire time, not even mouthing the poems recited as a group, I think many have speech delays. I can also see the problem in that the two groups 7 and 8 were together for the past 9 months or so and they would have had both Kazakh and Russian spoken to them all the time, it must have been confusing. Now I've added English to the mix. It is evident that Denis understands what is said to him as he does exactly as he is told.
After the play the children returned to their group area for afternoon meal. Today it was a roll filled with a cabbage, onion and carrot mixture and some biscuits and warm milk. As he was eating Yulia and I told Denis that I would be coming for 2 more visits and then I would be away for a many days. I used your phrases Amy about getting his bed ready and buying toys (his eyes lit up with that one). He also closed his eyes and pretended to sleep as Yulia was speaking to him, I know closing his eyes is one of Denis' coping mechanisms, I saw that a lot in the very early days of my visits. Then it was time to say goodbye for the day. I brought him back to his friends where they were eating in their little dinning room. His caregiver told him to blow kisses to his mama, which he very happily did.
So I have 2 more visits before I leave. Today I will go and buy a stuff toy for him for when I am gone. Thanks Diane for the encouragement.
I've pretty much packed everything and made the apartment as clean as I can. I did my final load of my laundry yesterday only to think I'd be returning home without all those clothes. The washing machines are front loaders here, but unlike at home, once you start them going they lock and cannot be opened until the wash finishes. I started the wash about and hour and 45 minutes before I needed to leave to go for lunch yesterday, the wash was suppose to take one hour and 20 minutes. At 11 (I needed to be out of the apartment at 11:25) the wash had 2minutes to go, great I thought, it will finish and I can hang the wash up to dry before I go. At 11:25 the wash was still going and still had 2 minutes to go, I was afraid if I left it, the machine would still be going when I came back from lunch, so I unplugged the machine. After lunch I plugged the machine back in and it said it had 3 minutes to go, 45 minutes later it was finally done. Whew, I was so happy to get my clothes back. I will be doing some more laundry before I go, but only with towels and linen from the apartment.
Oh and there is no heat, or barely any heat and no hot water in my apartment today. They are replacing the chimney for the boiler, so of course the work is being done now in January when the night time low goes to -26 or so. The apartment isn't actually cold, more in line with the temperature we'd have our home, but after the heat of the past 9 weeks it feels chilly.
And my other complaint is I think I've lost my satellite tv again. I don't know if it is time for the monthly payment, which wouldn't make sense to pay as I'm leaving tomorrow. Can you see me, no heat, no tv and the internet wouldn't stay connected, I was not a happy camper. I ended up going to bed at 9, I was so tired I think I went out like a light. But as the saying goes, early to bed early to rise, I was up just before 6 am our time.
I have to go the notary today to do something and I need to do paperwork for Denis' entry visa to Canada and today the judge is suppose to sign the adoption into reality as the 15 day appeal period ended yesterday. Tomorrow I go sign for his birth certificate, which here in Uralsk has to be done by the parents in person. And then I will have done everything I need to do.
I will have a visit today and a visit tomorrow and then I will be going home for the month.
Paka paka
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
Thanks for all the Great Suggestions
Thank you for all the wonderful suggestions on how to help Denis deal with my absence. I actually have a baby's photo album that I brought with me. It was an idea I got from Diane, she'd made one for Ciera. I brought the album with photos of my brother and sister, and some of my friends and their children. Now the album has pictures of Denis and I. During every visit we look at the pictures. I'll be leaving the album with him when I leave.
Also my translator is going to be going to the baby house with Jody every day, so she will from time to time go into Denis' room to see him. We hope he doesn't think that I am there when he sees her.
Denis' favourite caregiver will be working tomorrow. I will be giving her all the diapers I need to leave while I am gone, and Yulia and I have spoken to her about when I am away. She asked for a photo and I showed her the album, she thought the album was a great idea.
Oh and Susan, thank you for the idea about notes from the caregivers. I bought a little notebook and I will leave it there with them this week, Yulia will pick it up next week and translate the notes. The caregiver was very happy with the idea.
Today Denis was so cute he had me laughing my head off. When we go into the isolation room, our bonding space, he firsts wants to look out the window. Today when I lifted him up, he leaned on the sill and then asked to be let down. I put him on the ground and he went into my knapsack to get the snack ziplock bag. I helped him open the bag and he pulled the face cloth I bring. Then he asked me to lift him back up to the window where he promptly began to wipe the window sill and scrub at a mark on the wood. I'm sorry JB, but your nephew is into clean, you'll have to change your ways.
Later we had our first temper tantrum. Denis found a pen in my knapsack and I let him use it in a notebook, but then he decided that he wanted to write on the furniture and on the floor. On his second attempt I took the pen away. Oh the crying and the throwing himself on the floor. Unfortunately it was at the end of our ever so lengthy 20 minutes visit, but he did let me comfort him and he was smiling when he said goodbye.
3 more visits and then I'm head for home. I'm in the process of trying to change my tickets right now. It will only be the third time I've changed these tickets. They do say the third time is the charm, right?!
Paka paka
Also my translator is going to be going to the baby house with Jody every day, so she will from time to time go into Denis' room to see him. We hope he doesn't think that I am there when he sees her.
Denis' favourite caregiver will be working tomorrow. I will be giving her all the diapers I need to leave while I am gone, and Yulia and I have spoken to her about when I am away. She asked for a photo and I showed her the album, she thought the album was a great idea.
Oh and Susan, thank you for the idea about notes from the caregivers. I bought a little notebook and I will leave it there with them this week, Yulia will pick it up next week and translate the notes. The caregiver was very happy with the idea.
Today Denis was so cute he had me laughing my head off. When we go into the isolation room, our bonding space, he firsts wants to look out the window. Today when I lifted him up, he leaned on the sill and then asked to be let down. I put him on the ground and he went into my knapsack to get the snack ziplock bag. I helped him open the bag and he pulled the face cloth I bring. Then he asked me to lift him back up to the window where he promptly began to wipe the window sill and scrub at a mark on the wood. I'm sorry JB, but your nephew is into clean, you'll have to change your ways.
Later we had our first temper tantrum. Denis found a pen in my knapsack and I let him use it in a notebook, but then he decided that he wanted to write on the furniture and on the floor. On his second attempt I took the pen away. Oh the crying and the throwing himself on the floor. Unfortunately it was at the end of our ever so lengthy 20 minutes visit, but he did let me comfort him and he was smiling when he said goodbye.
3 more visits and then I'm head for home. I'm in the process of trying to change my tickets right now. It will only be the third time I've changed these tickets. They do say the third time is the charm, right?!
Paka paka
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)